Tag Archives: victims

How old are you? Five?

15 Nov

You know, I need to make one thing very clear: I do not hate Israel. I hate my government for how it treats the Palestinians and then wonders why there is no peace. The approach of “Let’s fuck their shit up, that’ll make’em stop being mean to us” is simply… what can I say… Well. And I hate my government for how it puts Israelis in harm’s way, and on the few days it doesn’t, simply neglects our well-being.
However, I do not hate Israel as a country, or Israelis as a people.

But they, we, can be unbelievable douchebags. 130 people are dead. People who lived in a country that, unlike Israel and the usa, manages to stay out of war and conflict for the most part. Cowards? I prefer calling it intelligence. As Mufasa said – “I’m only brave when I have to be”, and France is one of those smart countries that don’t provoke or aggravate situations where they “have to be”. Take notes, tantrum nations.
Now a lot of people are changing their Facebook profile pictures to the French flag. Personally, I do not participate. I have said my share of condemnation for the attacks, and I feel shaken and saddened for those poor people. However, I am done waving flags around – any flag. Flags represent places with borders and borders represent divisiveness.
To me, one human life is not worth less than another as long as neither has done horrible things to hurt another human life. An innocent Frenchman, to me, is no less precious than an innocent Jew or Palestinian, or Pygmy. Beirut has been torn apart just before Paris. Syria is being ripped to bloody shreds 24/7, and a Kenyan university was slaughtered in April and there were no hashtags…
I can’t put up a flag for every country or its people under attack or else that’d be my only activity day in, day out. And I will not make a selection what flag to display in solidarity, because then I would imply that the victims of one nationality are more deserving of my tears, than another. So, no flags from me. They are all in my heart and I have no need to wear my views on my picture, just as I don’t style myself to fit the scene of my preferred genre of music, and just as I don’t wear a cross around my neck while, though not observant, Jesus and the Church have played a role in my upbringing. It’s all in my heart and in my words – and that is enough.

Now, the disgrace is as follows. Israeli Jews are indeed frequent victims of terrorism. For which I blame my government just as much as the Palestinian radicals committing or encouraging the crimes. I feel for those victims who were not settlers hacking down Palestinian property and who were not soldiers beating up 12-year-old Arab boys. As I said, I hurt for all victims of violence – be it terror, rape, or school bullying. A Jewish victim of Palestinian terror is no more tragic and no more dead, than a girl shot by her jealous ex.
But when it comes to terror and hate crime? you’re a Jew! You know your peoples’ history! You/they have been persecuted, slaughtered, boykotted, hated. Where is your compassion now when it happens to someone else? This is the atrocity that puts Israel in the position and the bad light it is in today – too many nationalist Jews have learned the wrong lessons from the Holocaust. While Germany has turned 180° and compassionately, at some risk indeed, receives people running for their lives from the slaughter the Jews once tried to run from and found no country to rescue them, today’s Israeli Jewish nationalist screams for the borders to be closed to the Sudanese who get bombed daily. They act with dismay when Israeli soldiers – the ones they love to parade around as ever so compassionate – show that compassion by treating wounded Syrian civilians and combatants. Many of today’s Israeli nationalist Jews want people in situations similar to that of Europe’s Jews in the 40s, to be denied shelter just as Jews were denied shelter then, but continue to demand of gentiles to protect Jews, while not caring too much about gentiles in duress themselves, it seems.
It’s truly hilarious. They screech at the world how inclusive, welcoming, compassionate, diverse, tolerant, and humane Israel is, but when that compassion shows for anyone other than Jews… you throw a fucking tantrum because you feel the compassion isn’t mutual.

Because, and you’re right, the world doesn’t do a whole lot of #PrayforIsrael or Israeli flag profile pictures. There is an injustice there. But the injustice is mutual, don’t you think? Oh, because they’re being unfair, so you must be, too? Well, that’s also a mutual philosophy. And it’s shit. You can’t parade yourself around as a moral person representing God’s Chosen People (TM) and at the same time, deny a show of compassion to victims of violence just because you haven’t seen much coming your way. Compassion isn’t a currency, it’s a manifest of humanity, you assholes, and a requirement for godliness last time I checked.
If you were to get over your self/nation-centered self-pity, you might find the world’s attitude towards the Israeli people changing. The first step is up to you; nobody can make Israel look good but Israel itself.

The other thing is, the media coverage and pity you demand is simply not in proportion to our actual losses to Palestinian terror. I’m pretty sure, were 129 Israelis to die in one attack, that things would look much different. But most attacks claim about as many lives as any other murder – muggings, armed robberies, home invasions, school shootings, crimes of passion… I’m sorry? Why would two Jewish victims of a Palestinian terorrist be worth millions of solidarity pics and hashtags on social media and headlines in all international papers, if the same attention would never be given to a domestic murder-suicide with the same number of dead? You’re expecting special treatment: for every single Jewish victim you want to see a wave of outrage, while the media simply don’t usually do “One person got murdered today, somewhere in the world”, if the murder isn’t too unusual in nature. Why should they for Jewish victims of terror, what’s so special about that? It being a regular thing? Oh, and school shootings and domestic violence and suicides aren’t? Individual corpses, much less non-lethal stabbings, don’t make headlines, Jew or no Jew, people stab each other all the time.

130 people died a brutal, undeserved death. Many more do in Syria and Sudan and other countries. You don’t care. You have no right to complain that this lack of outrage is mutual. Unless you’re like the Nazis and consider the lives of one ethnicity more precious than those of another. Are you?

The world’s atittude towards Israel is not one of anti-semitism for the most part, it’s one of “WTF why are those people so self-centered and inconsiderate for, while whining that they’re not being treated nicely themselves?”. And you are doing all in your power to keep it that way.
You do that when you dedicate your spare time to tell your fellow Israeli Jews to be ashamed of themselves for showing solidarity with Paris. If you were truly worthy of the title of God’s Chosen People (TM), you would dismiss the lack of reciprocity and, even if you don’t participate in the displays of support, keep your begrudging mouth shut and don’t attack others for showing that support. You should encourage any behavior that makes Israelis look better in the eyes of the world. Instead, you want Sudanese sent back to their certain deaths because some of them may steal a bicycle, you want Palestinians to be treated like animals in hopes that’ll shut them up, and you yell at people for openly supporting the victims of an atrocity.

You are a horrible Jew and you are a horrible human being. Stop picking and choosing who deserves sympathy by ethnicity, faith, or nationality. Stop pissing all over global grief for 130 dead by screeching that the occasional 1 to 3 victims of terror in Israel don’t get the same media attention because the concept of proportion is lost on you. And stop complaining that nobody shows you sympathy when you show it only to your own yourself. Compassion is ideally mutual, but when it isn’t, you should still be able to figure out which option leads to better relations and understanding, and it isn’t “La la la you don’t put up my flag, so I don’t put up yours!”

We will never find peace if we expect others to treat us better than we treat them. One has to take the first step – them or us, indeed. If not them, then I guess we have to do it ourselves. Showing compassion is never wrong. And whatever you get out of it, you did the right thing by offering your compassion, your tears, your sympathy. Only good can come out of not being a complete and utter cunt.

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The Ethics of the Underworld

1 Jun

 I love the Israeli TV show “The Arbitrator”. It’s about a family of organized criminals. There seems to be more justice there than among law-abiding society.

You betray them? You die.
You collaborate with the enemy? You die.
You cheat on them? You die.
You kill their child/parent/spouse? They kill yours.
You break your word? They break your spine.
You beat a pregnant woman to the point she loses her baby and can’t have any more? You die.
Breakers of words get broken, destroyers of life get destroyed.

Law never seems to cover nearly enough on one end, but too much on the other. You liberate a tortured animal, you go to prison. You share the crimes of your government with your fellow citizens, you go to prison. You make love to a consenting minor who regrets nothing, you go to prison. But you cheat and betray, you cause hurt and even suicide, and that’s fine by law. You order a genocide (america’s war on Iraq), you get re-elected.
Law makes little sense that way. A traitor can do as much damage as a rapist. One violates trust, the other violates intimacy, but both violate a deeply precious, vital, and vulnerable element of a person’s soul that they need in order to be strong in their personal integrity. So why should one be punished, while the other one gets away with it? Same with school bullies. Victims of real crimes can be utterly devastated, and for that the perpetrator is punished. Yet bullying victims can sustain just as much damage, and are left to cope alone while their tormentors are rewarded by lack of consequence? Makes no sense.

I don’t think it’s right that the victim has to deal with the damage done while the pereptrator gets to get on with their life. It doesn’t matter to me how a victim responds. I don’t think there is responsibility in sustaining or dealing with something you didn’t choose to happen to you, but that was forced upon you needlessly and deliberately by a third party. It is not blameless misfortune like an earthquake or disease. It is a choice action that has been forced upon the victim. And so, any and all responsibility should lie with the perpetrator. Which is why it’s nice that in the Arbitrator, the person who started it when they did not need to, ends up dead, in a wheelchair, or worse.

You can’t spell reaction without re-, which means it’s a REsult, a REsponse to what has been done to you. Would I tell anyone to fuck off if they didn’t deliberately offend me first? Would a person be in prison if they hadn’t committed a crime first? So why should the response/ibility to any other type of transgression be anyone but the perpetrator’s problem? You can always, without exception, choose to not be the initiator of evil. The choice is yours and with it, the consequence. Victims have limited options – the most important limit being the inability to not have transgression happen to them. You get the stone rolling = it’s your fault and yours alone if someone doesn’t make it out of its path in time. Just as not everyone can outrun a rolling stone, not everyone can heal from a non-criminal transgression. A victim hasn’t got 100% control over the degree of damage done to them, a perpetrator always has 100% control over whether or not to initiate transgression. This should relieve the victim of any and all responsibility. A soul can be broken like a bone. One can have as little control over how fast the soul heals, as one has over the bone.

After all, when a crime is one by law, the perpetrator gets punished no matter if and how much damage was done to the victim. Some rape victims brush it off easily, others kill themselves, but the rapist still gets the same punishment and nobody tells the victim it’s their job to suck it up and move on. The perpetrator is still punished, the victim defended. Why not in the case of liars, cheaters, traitors etc.? Morally, they are no better than legal criminals. The underworld/organized crime is cruel, but at least people reap what they sow. Law-abiding citizens? One does something that kills the other’s soul, but the body remains intact, so he gets away with it.

One of my favorites on that show was when Nomie Spoonie ordered her lover killed. He pretended to love her to get in her pants, then promised to marry her with no intention of doing so, so he got what he deserved: his best friend was ordered to kill him, but only severed his spine and put him in a wheelchair, to be forever the captive of Nomie Spoonie, now legally married as promised, and miserable as deserved. That is justice. That needs to be legalized.

Reality makes no sense.

The Arrogance of Solidarity

15 Jun

Image

‘t Is me. Yeah. On the first night of October (the date on the picture is from the day I edited it), I shaved my head bald. Completely. With a woman’s hand razor. Over the course of hours. Since I like sharing my life and shocking people in the process, I immediately made sure Facebook knew about it.

And Facebook immediately made sure I knew what an empowering, inspiring woman I am.

…what?

Feminists lauded me for giving “rape culture” and “macho” society that much-needed message: “Fuck you, I will not please men and to drive my point home, I will now disfigure myself needlessly and excessively, I’m a woman, hear me roar!”
That isn’t the words they told me, but that’s all I hear when I hear/read angry feminists celebrating an excessive degree of making oneself undesirable or ugly to men just to piss them off or make a point. Like the emo(tionally unstable) teenager who slits her wrists and uploads that shit to Instagram to make sure her daddy understands that she feels raped by not being allowed to party with her boozehead friends until 5 am. Hurt or ridicule yourself more than you hurt, ridicule, or even change, others. I don’t believe in this. If I cannot fight a battle or a war unless the only scenario where my opponent loses, being one where I lose too, by putting myself in a long-term position where I would never want to be in, I will not fight. I will not suffer in the name of feminism; who cares whether macho society makes me suffer or I do it to myself?

The other reaction I got a lot was, well, friends and family of cancer/chemo patients praising me for my beautiful gesture of sparkling solidari—no. You know, with all due respect because I get you’re doing it with pure intentions, if I had cancer and someone who wasn’t even family went and shaved their hair off to tell me they understand my pain and suffer with and for me, I would rip their pubic hair out one by one and implant it into their heads using a staple gun. Then they know my pain.
I’ve never had cancer but from what I understand, it sucks. You lose organs over it, you spend years of pain and sickness with or without treatment, and you may die. In front of the miserable faces of your loved ones. Having shaved my head after always having treasured long hair to a point where I spent what little money I had, on extensions, I know how big a loss it is. Not a big one. As long as you got a nice face, you’ll be fine. It grows back. It’s a few months of looking unusual and maybe getting stares, so what? People stare all the time, it’s in our nature to stare at what we deem unusual. It’s not animosity that drives these stares, so calm down and stop beating people up for staring at chemo patients or other unusual-looking people – no one means them any harm or offense. Some even stare in awe.
Losing your hair is no fun, and most women, myself included, love long hair and wouldn’t want to lose it lightly. So yeah, it was a bit painful for me to lose my hair. It was one of the few things I had going for me appearance-wise. It wasn’t pleasant. But it was not a huge deal, either. Having cancer is a huge deal, and if you think that you can even begin to understand what a cancer patient goes through just by cutting your hair, errr nope. Losing your hair without losing an organ or a job or a spouse or your last bit of life by being chained to a hospital bed, is probably not a loss that would inspire awe or gratitude in a cancer patient for your “sacrifice”. You only lose your hair for a little while.
It would be different if you were to donate the hair to have wigs for cancer patients made. But on the other hand, there are enough wigs on the market that should be good enough. Indian women get screwed out of their hair all the time by being told it’s for the gods and then it’s really just for a greedy old man who makes money out of it. I’m guessing a wig is near the bottom of a cancer patient’s priorities, way underneath Survival, Family, and A-way-to-take-the-edge-off-this-agony.

So no, you’re not a hero.

Neither are you a hero if you’re one of those idiot Jews who get concentration camp tattoos. What the fuck? Again, just like the head-shavers-for-cancer, they just go and get the look, the mark, of a “victim of suffering”, and think this signifies solidarity. No. It signifies that you think you understand any extent of the horror Holocaust victims and survivors had to go through. But you don’t. You don’t have the memory of the abuse, the fear of death, the smell of your people being incinerated. You don’t have the memory of the indescribable feeling the survivors must have felt when they were freed. You got your number willingly, probably feeling all epic about yourself, and not at gun point. You don’t even begin to understand their suffering, and neither do I, and I refuse to sit my well-off ass down and get a tattoo for 50 bucks and a wince of pain, when the people who’ve inspired it, have been through so much more to end up branded. Unwillingly.

Getting a camp tattoo “in solidarity” with Holocaust survivors or in a victim’s memory, or shaving your head to show that you “get” cancer patients, is like going to a bar to have bad but consensual sex with a guy who ain’t your type, to show solidarity with rape victims.

You make no sacrifice. You sit down feeling all warm and fuzzy and do-goody about yourself by getting a small or temporary modification done or going through a period of inconvenience.

And as for that calf number 269 whose number you got tattooed somewhere it doesn’t bother you? Cute, now follow through and get slaughtered. Then you understand its pain. You sit around on your fat ass eating tofu only the better-off can afford, playing around on your Smartphone, trying on cute dresses, and somewhere in the background of your activity, you have a tiny little number tattoo. If calf 269 could speak, it would probably ask you what part of its pain, other than its number being burned into your skin, you share. And then it would shit on your hipster-ass canvas shoes.

And as for my bald head? In my quest for beauty I had ruined my hair with aggressive black perms and it was falling out in strands. There was no saving it, only getting rid of all the damaged hair (ALL the hair), and letting it grow back naturally. No sociopolitics, no cancer awareness, just the disappointment that yet another one of my desperate quests for beauty had gone horribly wrong.